IMHO

Procrastination

I have a weird habit that used to (and still does?) drive me insane. Whenever work starts flooding in, I feel like I'm about to drown and start "treading water" desperately, trying to keep my head above the waves...when in fact it's only starting to reach up to my knees. Back in the old days when I used to work for career's sake, or even in school, I absolutely hated it when work was left undone...I had to get rid of an assignment as quickly as I could once it landed in my "in" tray. Otherwise, other stuff would pile up and I'd get stressed and freak out and...well, suffice it to say that except for one occassion (and even then I ended up giving my boss a piece of my mind for being unduly burdensome) that that never really happened. Precisely perhaps being buried under an avalanche of undone work is one of my greatest fears - and it's only now, in retrospect, that I realize that. It probably goes without saying that I was a boss' dream - I always beat deadlines, sometimes even way ahead of time - and so merited the nightmare of being assigned with even more work whenever I thought I could chill out during the hours I'd saved. And that kind of pressure apparently still hounds me to this day, even though I've eschewed a more "regimented" career life in favor of free-lancing. I recently accepted an assignment for the maiden issue of Marie Claire Philippines, and the editor I submitted it to was "amazed" at my observance of deadlines (all I really did was submit on time - I suppose, speaking as an EIC myself, that contributors don't really take established deadlines too seriously). I only flaked (with profuse apologies) when it came time to submit my bio and photo (walastik) for the contributors' profile...the great procrastinator himself (who was supposed to take a photo considered decent enough for me to submit) and I kept putting it off for various reasons until I shamed myself enough to send in a non-set-up shot. Maybe it's the legal training I've had that's kept me on my toes - file your appeal one day later than the reglementary period and you not only face a failed appeal but possibly disbarment for negligence! Call me praning, but that's the way I am.

Anyway, I'm starting to feel like I'm treading water again...but my feet aren't even wet yet. There's so much stuff I'd like to do: write more articles, actually get started with projects that are still on the drawing board, clean my room (heh)...but there are just so many other things that need my immediate attention, like the He Cares 9th anniversary, Montalban duty, and some other domestic distractions. I know that I exaggerate the urgency and burden of the stuff on my To-Do List (because I usually cross off the "done" deeds quickly) and thereby suffer unnecessary stress, but old habits die hard! I admit to procrastinating, yes, that much I do in certain situations (especially if I don't particularly like the assignment), but thankfully I still manage to meet deadlines, even if I make a photo finish. And even then, I've never quite flaked out on anyone, much less on a professional level, and I hope I never turn into a flake either (I don't think I ever will, my ka-praningan would never allow it!).

posted by Honey Oliveros @ 10:40 PM